Our mothers told us that we couldn’t possibly love another until we first learned to love our self. 
They did all sorts of things to help us learn that lesson.
If it wasn’t your mother telling you, it was somebody wise and older and they were correct. How are you going to attract the person of your dreams into your life if you don’t have a beautiful invitation for them? YOU are the invitation! You are a beautiful invitation.
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If you are pining away worried about how to date, attract, retain, cultivate, have the love affair you say you want to have, you need to know yourself and really have the love affair be with you first. I know—it sounds a little nutty but it is true. Have you ever spent time around someone who doesn’t really like themselves? It was funny in the 1970s when Woody Allen would be on the big screen lamenting his persona but it was a kind of dark comedy and his love life was not a happy story.
You want a happy story, right?
The first step is to allow yourself the time to BE YOUR OWN BEST FRIEND.
Everybody loves the person who seems to have fun whether they are alone or in a group. Of course, they love their own company, they get a kick out of themselves and are a joy to be in the presence of. When was the last time you enjoyed your own companionaship? The problem is that if you resist this idea, you become one of those people who needs to be around someone else all the time or you are unhappy, whiny, fussy, and miserable. And even then, you want the other person to MAKE you happy. Life doesn’t work that way. You need to find your own inner joy and then share it.
All human beings crave a deep to deep connection. You need to know yourself well enough to be in a position to BE EMOTIONALLY AVAILABLE and in a healthy manner with another. If you are busy hiding form yourself, embarassed about who you are, every relationship you have will be exhausting and feel artificial. Relax about the person that you have become, trsut that you are a good and lovable type and you will find the mate best suited for you as you extend the effort to find them and be genuine.
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We love balance between depth and levity. Life is not a morose activity, use your funny bone and ENJOY THE LIGHTER SIDE OF LIFE. You don’t need to be a stand up comedian but we each have our own sense of humor and it is fun to laugh and to get others laughing with you. We are all attracted to people who make us feel happy, laughter is a genuine sign of feeling happy even if only for a moment. 
is truly precious and timeless.
Imagine how this world would be if everyone lived by this simple philosophy of treating others as you would like to be treated.
You want to know where you are in the scale of things and how to make it happen? Take this quick quiz!
1. I love myself and I like myself. True False
2. I have a happy story that is my life and it is in process. True False
3. I am making myself happy, not looking for another to do the job. True False
4. I crave going deep to deep with another. True False
5. I have humor in my life daily, it is healthy. True False
6. I strive to live by The Golden Rule. True False
7. I’m not a saint, not perfect but I am a decent human being. True False
The quiz is written in blue font — true blue font– because I want you to think about being true blue to your self and to your life so that you can create the life you really want and healthfully deserve. You should be able to answer TRUE to each of the questions above. If you didn’t, take a sneak peak inside of Build the Strength Within and begin your magnificent journey.
